RESIGNATION
"So, baby, what can we do now?"
"Honestly, I'm confused too. I don't know what to do."
"I saw this coming, and I've prepared for my exit before marriage. If not for all these disappointments here and there."
"I understand."
"But, in the first place, why should companies have such a policy. That's evil, it's against human nature. So, couples cannot work in the same company again?"
"Hmm."
"Seriously, the management is evil. Some of these big bosses at the top are cultists. It's not normal to say staff should resign because his or her spouse is in the system."
"Well, we can't blame them. We both have a good understanding of the policy before we got married. So, we can't blame the management."
"I understand you but once again, what can we do now?"
"You're the husband and the head of the family. Let me hear from you. What do you have in mind? What's your plan?"
"I think you should resign. I can easily get a loan for you to start a small business, and you'll start growing from there. By God's grace, I will eventually join in the business later. After all, both of us can't be on salary for life. We will still need to start a business somehow."
"So, what kind of business do you think I can do?"
"For now, what I can think of is an eatery, poultry or a big shop in the market where you can sell fast-moving consumer goods."
"They are good ideas, but the problem is, I never enjoyed doing business, I'm a career person and I have a future in the company."
"So, it's me that doesn't have a future in the company?"
"No, I don't mean it that way."
"Okay, what do you have to say?"
"I don't know what to say. Thoughts are just moving too fast in my mind. I can't easily grab one."
"Grab one and say something."
"Well, what I have to say is this. Since I am a step ahead of you in the company, and you have small experience in business. Why not resign, try your hands on those businesses you proposed, and I can raise a better loan to push the business?"
"That's not a bad idea, but -"
"But what?"
"You won't understand it."
"Understand?"
"I don't know how to put it."
"Put it anyhow, I will understand."
"You won't understand, because we have different upbringings, your family background is purely westernised and mine is traditional and a bit westernised."
"What has that got to do with this?"
"Now, listen."
"I'm listening."
"Using our situation as an example, as the head of the family, if I resigned. Friends and family will see it as a kind of weakness, it would look as if my wife is in charge and I don't have a say in our family matters. It looks ridiculous, no matter how I tried to explain it to them. That is the standard in this society but for someone that comes from your background, you're just looking at the logical side of the matter, and you won't understand."
"My dear, honestly, I understand you, but with our education, the two of us know that logic is better than tradition or societal standard. That does not hold water."
"You see, I said you won't understand."
"Hold on, if I want to show understanding on this issue, what I am supposed to do is to automatically resign, right?"
"No, I am just telling you how society sees it. My logical explanation is this. You know I am supporting my family members. For example, I still pay my parents rent and take care of my two younger sisters in the University, so, pending the time business will pick up, it won't make sense for me to be seeking help from you every time, I need to support my parents and sisters."
"They are my parents too."
"I know, but the fact is, the relationship still has some dividing lines, there are issues I attend to in the family that you don't need to know. That's what it takes to be a man."
"And what does it take to be a woman?"
"Listen."
"I'm listening."
"In your own case, if you resign, the business will pick up easily because you have fewer expenses."
"Fewer expenses? How?"
"Your parents don't need your financial help and your siblings are financially stable. So, if you resign, we will be better off."
"I understand you, but I can't do business, I am a career person. I have better prospects in the company and I can easily leave for better companies."
"Invariably, you're saying I don't have prospects, right?"
"No, I am just saying my side of the story. With a good degree and Masters in the UK, I can't even imagine it. To sit my parents down and tell them I want to go into business. Ah! I just can’t imagine it."
"So, my Nigerian Master’s degree has limitations. Right?"
"I'm sorry, I don't mean it that way. Stop implying and twisting my explanation."
"I am not twisting your explanation, but wait, let me clear this issue once and for all. There is something about your UK certificate that is deceiving you. You need to understand that you're a woman, you can hardly go beyond that level if you're not in an affair with any of those big bosses in the system. It is better for you to quit now. As a man, I can still go far!"
"Oh no! Here we go again! Nigerian mentality has set in again. When a woman is rising in an organisation, society will accuse her of sleeping with guys at the top. At this point. Do whatever you like. I am not resigning."
"Okay, let management decide. Let's wait and see who is relevant to them."
"Yes, let's leave it that way. I won't allow you to ruin my career as Segun did to Florence."
"Segun?"
"Yes, Segun. Florence left because of him. Now see what happens to her. She can't get a good job up till now and Segun is in the system, misbehaving, sleeping with all those contract staffs in the system and hanging out in the evening."
"But, I am not Segun."
"Please, leave me alone. Let management decides."
"Okay."
QUALIFICATION.
“Honestly, I don’t think people still have anything like real love in their hearts these days. It must have died after the first world war or before Nigeria’s Independence.”
“How do you mean?”
“I mean the love for humanity. Caring and sharing seem not to be there anymore.”
“You want to talk about the people in power again?”
“No! I’m not politically inclined this morning. I think I’m viewing real love from another perspective today?”
“From what perspective?”
“From relationships point of view.”
“You mean choosing a spouse or interpersonal relationships?”
“Choosing a spouse.”
“You must have woken up from the romantic side of the bed today.”
“You might be right.”
“Alright, what did you see?”
“The way people choose a spouse these days baffles me.”
“Why?”
“Because choosing a spouse these days seems to be based on projections, calculations and financial strengths.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I mean guys of today are now focusing on ladies’ background, especially when the affair is moving towards marriage.”
“Ladies also do the same thing.”
“I agreed with you, but why should both sides be interested in financial strength rather than love?”
“Now, I understand where you’re going to.”
“Take the case of Wale and Roseline for example. Wale said it won’t be easy to cope with her because she’s an NCE graduate. He said there’s a limitation to the kind of job or income she will contribute to the family.”
“Is he crazy?”
“I thought as much, but he’s not the only one on course, there are millions of guys and ladies out there that are into such.”
“That’s terrible.”
“Try to get this and find out if you could. Did you notice that these days University graduates are now going for their likes, while Polytechnic graduates pitch their tent with their own and NCE also find their levels?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Well, it’s not compulsory we view things the same way but I know for sure that a female University graduate will hardly go for a male NCE graduate unless he is financially okay.”
“How could she go for such? Can you too allow your sister that graduated from the University to marry an NCE graduate, especially, one that’s still struggling or managing a job?”
“What is in it? If there’s love there, why can’t they marry each other?”
“Well, I won’t like to support that if anyone of my sisters is into such.”
“Why?”
“I believe everyone should look for his or her own class.”
“But, what has class got to do with love?”
“They have a lot in common.”
“Like what and what?”
“You know, if you married your level, I mean someone of equal intellectual capacity, view of life, almost the same financial status and some other positive factors, you will both have peace of mind, the same focus, better understanding, conclusions and be able to do things together conveniently without stress.”
“You’re right but all these cannot work without love.”
“That’s one of those reasons I was trying to bring out about class and love. Don’t you know class sparks up or ignites love? It is always easy to be attracted to someone of the same class or level as you, it will be very easy for you to flow in the same direction and your love will begin to grow. Very simple, just like that!”
“I understand you, but for me, I think an affair with a foundation based on a class cannot stand the test of time…..you know sometimes in life, especially after marriage, problems may come and class might be affected but it is love that will stand through all odds. When you love someone, you will always love him or her and stand by him or her, no matter how worse a situation may be, the love would still be there.”
“You’re taking it to another length.”
“Like how?”
“Are you trying to prove that people with the same class or level cannot have a happy home?”
“No! What I’m telling you is that love is the main thing, people of the same class will have a happy home if they truly love each other, so also do people of different classes or religions, they’ll definitely have a happy home if the relationship was based on true love.”
“What brought your mind into this in the first place?”
“I just look around and I got to realize that marriages of today seem to be based on what both have in stock financially and the gains they are going to have from the union, not really based on true love.”
“I see.”
“Besides that, the issue of B.Sc and HND is eroding my affair with Bimpe.”
“How?”
“Everybody in her family is University graduates, and they seemed to make a jest of her. I guess that’s why she always complains, urging me to go back for my B.Eng or B.Sc on time, besides that, I don’t like how her mother usually attends to me whenever I go there, I always see the bad impression in her eyes. One day, I heard her mother talking with a friend on the phone, if you heard all she said about Polytechnic graduates, honestly, you’ll go and hang yourself. It was then I began drawing the conclusion that they hate Polytechnic graduate in their family, but let’s ask ourselves ‘what has that got to do with love?”
“Some families are like that.”
“But that notion is wrong. I don’t think people view things like this in foreign countries. I mean Europe and America.”
“We can’t really say, you know we’ve not been there before.”
“Well, I’ll ask people abroad whenever I have the chance or when I’m chatting on the internet.”
“But how could Bimpe think like that she knows you’re good academically.”
“I don’t know what’s wrong with her, maybe she thinks a man with a University degree will bring her joy and a happy home”
“But I’ve watched a Foreign film where things like this disrupt a relationship.”
“I’m not arguing that it doesn’t happen up there, but it is not rampant like we have here because I’ve seen and read about so many Female European and American graduates whose husbands did not attend the University, even, I have a friend abroad who only have secondary school certificate and a fairly good job, still, a Canadian lady married him with her University degree and good income.”
“Really?”
“Yes! That’s what I’m telling you about love but here, a female graduate will only go for such only on the ground that the man is extremely rich. That’s the only reason that can make the word ‘love’ come out from her mouth.”
“Well, I can’t really say, but let me ask you this. Can you marry a matured lady with an ordinary secondary school certificate?”
“It’s a pity you never know.”
“What?”
“That my new love is of that qualification.”
“An SSCE holder?”
“Yeah! A trader, she sells foodstuffs at Gbagi market.”
“Aaah! Are you crazy?”
“I’m not crazy. Love must have led me to her.”
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