Showing posts with label Enduring Love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Enduring Love. Show all posts

Saturday, 17 January 2026

When love becomes a burden and not a blessing.

The truth dawned on Amara slowly, the way most painful truths arrive; quietly and in moments that seem ordinary until they pile up. She was always the strong one. The one who listened without interrupting, who stayed calm when emotions ran high, who knew exactly what to say when everything felt like it was falling apart.

In the beginning, she didn’t mind. Love, she believed, was patience. Love was endurance. Love meant staying even when it was hard. So when he leaned on her, she stood firmer. When he doubted himself, she spoke with confidence for both of them. When he fell apart, she held the pieces together with gentle hands and tired smiles.

People praised her for it. You’re so understanding. 

He’s lucky to have you.

And those words made the weight feel meaningful—at least for a while.

But slowly, love began to feel like labour.

She noticed she was always the one checking in, apologising first, smoothing things over. His growth depended on her encouragement. His peace depended on her silence. His happiness depended on how much of herself she was willing to give up.@

When she spoke about her dreams, he changed the topic. When she needed comfort, he offered distractions. His attention was always somewhere else—on his phone, his plans, his world. Whenever she tried, the conversation circled back to him—his stress, his past, his struggles. Her needs felt like inconveniences. Her exhaustion went unnoticed.She stopped sharing her worries because there was no space for them. 

The realisation came on an ordinary afternoon. He was upset again, and she reached for the familiar role; comforter, fixer, anchor. But this time, her body resisted. Her chest felt tight. Her hands felt heavy. And a quiet thought surfaced, clear and undeniable. She took her bag and left.

That night, Amara lay awake, replaying conversations, wondering when love had started to feel so lonely. She missed the version of herself who laughed easily, who spoke freely, who didn’t feel responsible for another adult’s emotional survival.

Weeks passed without calls. Days slipped by without messages. One night, she called him.

“Hey,” she said. “I haven’t heard from you for a while.”

“I’ve been occupied,” he replied, distracted. “Work, friends, stuff.”

“Do you ever get occupied with me?” she asked.

There was a pause.

“Amara, don’t start this again.”

She swallowed. “I’m not starting anything. I just want to feel like I matter to you.”

“You’re being dramatic,” he said. “You know I care.”

But his voice didn’t sound like he cared.

Later, she sent one final message: “I’ve been feeling neglected.”

His reply came hours later: “You’re overthinking.”

One evening, Amara sat alone at the bus stop, watching people rush past. A boy ran toward his girlfriend, smiling, holding her bag, laughing at something she whispered. It wasn’t loud love. It wasn’t dramatic. It was present.

That’s when the truth settled in her heart. Feeling neglected wasn’t a misunderstanding.

Feeling uncared for wasn’t imaginary. Men invest where their hearts are.

And his heart simply wasn’t with her.

So Amara stopped begging for attention. She stopped shrinking to fit into someone’s half-effort. Instead, she chose herself.

Because real care doesn’t make you feel invisible. It makes you feel seen.

Love, she understood then, was never meant to be a one-person effort. It was supposed to meet you halfway, not rest entirely on your shoulders. It was meant to nourish you, not slowly drain you dry.

She took a calm decision to stop carrying what was never hers to hold. She expected guilt, but what came instead was relief. Deep, unfamiliar relief.

With time, she felt lighter. Her laughter returned. Her voice grew stronger. She learned that real love doesn’t require you to disappear to keep it alive.

And she never forgot the truth she gained through experience: love that needs you to carry it becomes a burden, not a blessing.


Ngozi Ebubedike Ahumibe

Monday, 26 August 2024

Unsung Heroines: Grandma, the Great by Ejiro Otive-Igbuzor.


Book Review

It is a story of enduring love woven through the trials of a young nurse named Mary and her mother's unwavering support.

Mary, a dedicated nurse, fell in love with a young man named Vincent when he brought his aunt to the hospital for treatment. Their whirlwind romance led to an unexpected pregnancy just as Vincent set off for a better future abroad. Mary found herself overwhelmed by the weight of her situation. The realisation hit her hard: she might have to leave school, and the thought of breaking the news to her mother terrified her.

How would she tell a mother who left her husband in the city to the village for a chance to send her female children to school? A woman who worked tirelessly, selling whatever she could to ensure her children had the best? How could she tell her mother, a devout catholic, a well-known socialite and a community leader, that her daughter got pregnant out of wedlock?

For Mary, it seemed like the end of the road until she realised the depth of her mother’s enduring love. When she finally confessed her pregnancy, her mother experienced a whirlwind of emotions, including anger, disappointment, and love. “Mama grappled with her emotions, torn between her love for her daughter and her fear of societal judgment.” Despite her fear of societal judgment, her mother's love prevailed.   

Mama understands that love means not abandoning Mary, but guiding her through this challenge. “Being a good mother doesn’t mean shielding your children from mistakes or judgments,” she realised. “Instead, it means standing by their side, helping them navigate their challenges, and instilling the resilience needed to overcome adversities.”

Her love and support gave Mary the strength to bear the burden of her pregnancy with pride. When she gave birth, her mother took over the nurturing of the child and sent her back to school. Mama cared for her daughter and granddaughter even when communications ceased between Mary and Vincent, the child's father. 

In the end, Vincent returned, ready to reclaim his family. However, the true hero of this story remains Mary’s mother, whose words and actions provide the physical and moral strength her daughter needs to face her challenges and fulfil her dreams.

The story calls for mothers to love their children unconditionally and be their support system, especially during times of difficulties. Being a good mother means standing for and with your children in good times and in bad times of their lives.

The story of Mary and Vincent shows the power of genuine love. When love comes from the heart and not the lips, nothing douses it.

Please read this and many other interesting stories about women’s struggles, families, and relationships in We Rise!


Get copies here

https://selar.co/6q2x71

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https://www.lulu.com/spotlight/galsglobalhangout


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