 |
| Photo: Getty Images // |
The small things make a big difference. You can achieve a happy relationship by focusing on the positive things.
| by Linda J. //
When a relationship hits a rocky patch, many people focus on the negative side. Don’t do this, avoid that…
But the secret to a successful relationship is not to highlight the negative, but to accent and maximise the positives. A happy relationship focuses on the do’s not the don’ts, the cans not the can nots.
Couples who actively work towards creating a fun, satisfying and intimate relationship for each other have a longer lasting successful relationship than those who drift along or concentrate on avoiding the negative aspects.
How do you maintain a happy relationship?
1. Be playful and have fun
Life is more than working, sleeping and paying the bills. It is supposed to be fun, a happy relationship is fun.
One of the first things to disappear when you get so wrapped up in the mundane and busy side of life is your sense of fun with your partner. Use your silly pet names, have a joke and tease them, take time out to have that pillow fight!
2. Show some gratitude and pay compliments
Add some sparkle to your partners’ day and pay them a compliment. When a relationship starts to mature we start to take our partners for granted. Even a simple “thank you” for doing a mundane task works well.
Use “you” rather than “I” when you do express your gratitude, it makes it far more meaningful! What works better? “I really enjoyed dinner, thank you” or “You are a great cook, dinner was amazing, thank you”.
3. Pay attention to your partner
When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, it’s easy to stop noticing changes in your partner. We are all individuals and never stop growing and changing.
Couples in a successful relationship pay attention to their partners, they notice the small things.
4. Celebrate success and achievements no matter how small
Your partner is more than just a shoulder to cry on in tough times. Couples in a happy relationship don’t miss an opportunity to celebrate success or cheer each other on. When something good happens make the most of it!
5. Hug your partner
Physical closeness enhances your connection with your partner. Yes, regular sex is great, but even if your sex life has faltered, you can maintain that closeness. A hug, a back rub, holding hands or a simple touch can boost your emotional connection with your partner.
6. Say it with… words?
Nothing beats a hand written letter or note. Writing shores up those romantic feelings and gives the warm fuzzy feeling when you receive a letter from the one you love. You don’t have to be a literacy expert either, a post it note on the mirror, “I love you!” written in the snow, a note left in a lunchbox – you get the idea, be creative. Write down your feelings for your partner and let them know.
7. Take responsibility for your happiness
A successful relationship is a partnership, investing time in your life and happiness will mean you have more to offer that partnership. This is even more important if your relationship is going through a rocky patch.
Don’t focus on what your partner is doing wrong (or not doing at all); make your own life more satisfying by not relying on your partner to be the only source of happiness. This helps take the pressure off and bring a positive attitude back into the relationship.
Small positive gestures are important; they help maintain a happy relationship. The possibilities to add more small gestures to your relationship are endless. Just using one or two of these secrets for creating a successful relationship will make a big impact – try them and see!
